Come here dear one, and sit beside me.
I’ve been spending so much time with the youngest version of us that I forgot that it’s you who needs so much healing. Classic adolescent woe.
I’m so sorry that I have left you alone for so long. That I was ashamed of you and tried to stuff you away and pretend you didn’t exist. That I constantly felt like I had to make up for you.
Your feelings and your needs are so big. Sometimes I’m not sure I can heal all of us. But you are the version of me that needs the most care.
As often as I’ve been ashamed, I have been proud and also jealous. You are so bold and so brave, you fight tooth and nail to be who you are, even when you aren’t sure who that is. In many ways you know more about us, than I do now.
You get in your own way so often, in so many ways. It’s ok. How should you know how to love yourself, when you have never been shown? How are you to know that love is not something you have to earn, that you are valuable beyond measure and need no validation.
You are too precious to give yourself away so easily. There will never be a fair exchange when the product you offer is of such high value. You will always get low balled. Believe people when they show you who they are.
You make mistakes. Really big ones. You put yourself in danger on many occasions. You get out alive, but not without a price.
You are so, so smart. I’m sorry that no one recognizes your mental illness well enough for you to live up to your potential. That you do not have a support system to help you get better. I’m sorry you have been shamed and blamed and considered a lost cause.
You are a good person with a true heart. You are a genuine and loyal friend. You care about what is right and fair. You stand up for yourself and others, even if it makes your knees shake. You have poetry in you heart and music in your soul. Fun is your middle name. Your wit and sense of humor have no bounds. No one is bored when you are around.
You are so, so beautiful and not in the way you have heard so many times. Your heart is beauty. You have a talent for feeling feelings, yours and others. You will keep this deep sense of empathy for always. It will be a blessing and a curse. There is no other way.
You deserve better than the hand that you were dealt.
Sadly you were meant to lose your greatest love, so that you might learn to love yourself. The loss might not have been quite so devastating if you were receiving the love and support you needed from the start.
You deserve the life that you will grow into. I could never be here if it weren’t for you, all your bad choices and mistakes, failures and wins. You just wait until you see the beauty you create.
Thank you dear one. Have fun. Smile bright. Always love with your whole heart. Be safe. Be patient, this too shall pass. I love you. Meet you around 25.
little victories 
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